Rapid Urbanization, Too busy and Internet has affected Mentally in all age group.
A girl leaves in an Apartment with her husband. She works in one of the NGO and everyone respects her at the office. She has a harmonious relationship with her husband as well. They have also planned for the baby soon. Viewing from Layman Sense their life seems to be perfect. Inside they are suppressed, internally, they feel loneliness. She feels as if she is an orphan though her husband is with her. Such type of feeling she can neither share with her husband nor with any other. When such kind of emotions crossed its limit she went to visit the psychiatrist. After lthe ong discussion the psychiatrist told, “It is the signal of Loneliness.” “How ” She panicked and asked He replied ”There are various relation that world sees upon you. You haven’t felt any kind of relation and support that you are getting from others. When you feel like this you feel emptiness.”
It has been three months she is under regular counseling with the psychiatrist. “Physically I am well off. So, it feels rigid to tell that I am facing loneliness problem.” She said, “But there are lots of people who are undergoing such loneliness and they look normal from the outer world but they are suppressed inside”. She told that Loneliness is becoming a silent killer these days.
Rita Adhikari started to spent her life in Kathmandu for better study of her children when her husband flew abroad. Everything was running as usual but unfortunately, her meeting with the friend at Newroad news reached to her parent’s in law and they started doubting her. Her husband started to scold her. She stated to enter into the initial phase of depression and her children also started to follow her path. After a few days she was taken to the psychiatrist and found out that she was highly affected by depression. Now she is taking medicine and counseling.
A well-known psychiatrist Pashupati Mahat welcomed parents who came complaining about their son. Son was educated and who just passed +2 level. After a long talk, Mahat finds out that Parents kept their son at Hostel from Grade 1. That’s the reason why son cannot find parental hood and closeness in his parents. The boy missed the environment of the hostel and his friends and started living alone in his room. “Parents were in stress from the behavior that was seen in their son and they were even afraid to talk with him.” Mahat who is diagnosing such type of case says ”Mistake are of Parents. For any Children, pthe arental hood is more important than study .” Mahat is now counseling both parents and son.
These three-dimensional examples reflect the depth of loneliness as well as shows at what level and at what amount loneliness is capturing and bonding our society. Children; in absence from the parental hood, Adult; indifference in choice and friends, Older people being far from their family, Middle-aged people running after success. Every age group is affected by loneliness.
According to the psychiatrist due to lack of time on breastfeeding to infant also has created loneliness for baby. Political, Social, Unemployment are still there to create loneliness. Besides this wife whose husband is abroad are mostly affected by loneliness. Mahat who is also associates of the Center for Mental Health and Counselling states “Most of the people who visited here among them 80% are of women whose husband are abroad.”
Husband goes abroad and wife feels alone. From that earning of husband, the house may be built but family gets destroyed. Numerous women are still there who are divorced. Regarding women, even celebrity are also affected by it. One of the celebrity says “Artificial smile and relation makes you empty inside. Sometimes I feel to run away from this crowd.” Ironically, most of us are unaware that loneliness is the psychological problem. Neither stakeholders are also aware of it.
We feel that in the developed country almost everyone are happy. But the fact isn’t true. Western people are more affected by loneliness. This year Britain has invented the ministry of loneliness. This is one of the preventive measures to control loneliness. 14% of the population of Britain is affected by loneliness. Establishment of the ministry of loneliness in Britain drew the attention of the world. New York Times even asked its readers “Do you also feel the necessity of loneliness ministry establishment in the USA?” The same question was also asked Tribuhan Teaching Hospital mental (psychiatric) department doctor, Mr. Saroj Ojha. He answered “Instantly it is not necessary. Our oriental culture is harmonious compared to occidental” He further added, “But we wonder establishment in Britain and if we are unable to manage on time then we should also face similar kind of problem in future.”
Even though a large group is affected any research hasn’t been conducted in Nepal. A simple example of India helps us to guess or estimate the present condition of loneliness. In India, an IT student has created sharing dard.com. In which “I am lonely” Phrase is searched for more than 46 thousand times. Which mean net of loneliness is spreading at a pace.
Every day and every hour many physical happiness tools are being discovered and created. A patient of Patan hospital said that everything is there but the absence of relatives and relation is making us empty. Specialist is claiming that in upcoming days people will be victimized by loneliness. Support of relatives that provides you self-satisfaction cannot be obtained from any materialistic world. And that Support is degrading day by day.
Internet: A Curse/Imprecation
We are being educated and knowledgeable but we are losing our practical relations. We are all surrounded by people but at the time of necessity, we are alone. When People have to face the same situation then they whirl in it. This day the internet has become one of our basic needs. We are eager to collect information from the internet. There is competition to be first and that is possible only because of the internet. If we update our facebook status “Feeling sick” then thousands of your friend comment you with “Get well soon” But if they have to come to the hospital to look after you when you are alone. You are being with friends in your virtual world rather than in reality. And every time the virtual world doesn’t work. “In this situation, loneliness surrounds you more. There’s no one with you,“ says Ojha.
If we look at a glance, the Internet is a good medium of communication. Facebook, Twitter, and social networking site are the main obstacles to physical presence. A few years earlier we use to call our friends to meet and share our emotions and ideas but these days we are in hurry to get connected with internet and enjoy our own virtual world. Even if we meet then we get stuck with our mobile. If we have internet we start chatting and internet is not available then we start playing games. We are just getting artificial interaction from these virtual worlds of facebook, twitter, and other networking sites. Excessive use of these sites has made people irrelative, outside the social world as well as different from others. There are guardians who provide their children with smartphones and get to their works. “This kind of activities not only affects children but also every age group. In order to establish your relationship you have to meet physically rather than virtually,” States Child psychiatrist Bandana Sharma.
Medicine is to hug
Loneliness is taken commonly in Nepali society. If we cannot understand loneliness on time then it may take a great form in the future. Doctor Pawan Sharma says ”Loneliness is not a depression but continuous loneliness will result to depression. Depression will lead to suicide.”
Citing American Surgeon General Bibek Murthi New York Times writes “Loneliness decreases that amount of your lifespan that you degrade by smoking 15 cigarettes.” American Close Relationship And Health lab found out that loneliness has the effect on Heart and arthritis. British Royal College of General PR actioners states that “Loneliness is dangerous diseases like diabetes. Loneliness kills our thinking and memory capacity. Decreases in immunity.” Western people are quite worried that is loneliness plague.